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k_a_webbUriel knew if he stayed sitting in his room all he’d do was watch Samael and that was something Uriel didn’t want to do. It wasn’t going to do him any good, so, breathing a deep sigh, he shut down the mirror. Running a hand through his hair he focused on one of the places he wanted to be. Moments later he was stood in Hades, hoping that the deity it was named after would turn up, because he needed someone to talk to. Just being in Hades helped. It was peaceful and as he wandered along one of the rivers he felt himself relax.
“What’s up, Uriel?” a voice asked from behind him and Uriel turned to look at Hades without hiding the relief he felt that the deity who’d become his good friend.
“I just needed to get away from the other angels.”
“Things bad again?”
“When aren’t they?” Uriel shrugged. “Mikhael’s planning a party, because he thinks it will do us some good to spend time together, and Gabe finally told me why he avoids us and the spirits in the afterlife.”
“Gabriel did have it hard.” Hades reached out and gently squeezed Uriel’s shoulder. “Uriel, you’re doing the best you can. I know it’s not easy to be an angel and I’m proud of you for the work you’ve done to keep yourself going no matter how hard things have got.”
“Sometimes I’m still tempted by the idea of drinking the waters of Lethe, Hades. I want to know why I am what I am, but it’s a question I don’t think I’m ever going to get an answer for.” Uriel bit his lip. “I don’t even know who I should be asking.”
“If I knew who you could ask I’d tell you. I talked to Hecate about the angels and even she doesn’t know why you exist, although she does have a theory that you might have been created by the thoughts of people who believed in you.”
“Hecate’s theory makes a lot of sense.” Uriel looked out at the waters that flowed past them as he thought. “I’ve always believed that if someone had created us then they’d have been there to help us and that’s what we really needed…” He shook his head. “We still need help now, but if we’re tulpas then we need to help ourselves rather than keep looking for someone to help us.”
“You’re not alone with this. We’ll help you if you want and there are several deities who know what it’s like to now know what to do with the immortality you were granted.”
“Are we truly immortal?”
“I think you are. It’s not the same sort of immortality, because if the time comes when no one believes in you then you might end up fading away, but I can’t see that ever happening. People on Earth still believe in Gabriel, even though he has no connection to the world or the afterlife.”
Nodding, Uriel sat down next to the river. “The stories that created us are still passed on from one generation to another, so I’m not surprised, and I know Gabe was in a lot of them.”
“Plus there are always new stories being written. To the mortal humans both deities and angels are fascinating to them, because they live for a finite span before moving onto another life, while we get to watch them go through life after life.” Hades sat down next to Uriel. “I can imagine being the same way if I was one of them, but I was born a deity so to me they’re fascinating. Especially the humans who are beginning to learn more about their past lives.”
“Humans fascinate me too.” Uriel thought back to when he was watching Caitlyn. “The more I learn about them the more I want to get to know them during their lives as well as during their deaths.”
“What’s stopping you?” Hades shook his head. “You have the freedom to do whatever you want with your life, Uriel, so if you want to start connecting more with humans then do it. Maybe the other angels wouldn’t agree with your choices, but that doesn’t mean you should be scared of doing what feels right to you.”
“I don’t know what the other angels would think. If they agree with Hecate’s theory it might give us all a new place to start from, but I’m just not sure if talking to them about it would be the right thing to do. A number of the angels already think I’m strange because of my friendship with you and my thoughts about having a closer connection with the deities.” Uriel shrugged. “I think Mikhael has this strange idea in his mind that I’m looking for God, because he is the one who’s supposed to have created us, but I don’t believe in God.” He smiled. “I don’t believe in the deities either, but that’s for a different reason entirely.”
“Believing in someone you think of as a friend isn’t easy.”
“Exactly.” Uriel leaned back, onto his hands, and stared up at the roof of Hades. “Did you take your name from the underworld or was the underworld named after you?”
“I think it was a bit of both. When I was first asked to become one of the deities of the Greek pantheon Hades wasn’t the name I chose to use, but the longer I spend being the Greek God of the underworld the more I came to feel like it should be my chosen name, and it became the name of the underworld about the same time I decided to change my name, in part I think because I was connecting more with place I found myself in control of.”
“What were you called before?”
“Like all the deities I had a number of names, Uriel, even though I’ve always been death deity.” Hades sighed. “Being a death deity isn’t an easy job, but it was always who I was, even when I first started training to become a deity, so that meant I chose several names that I wouldn’t have done if I was a winter deity, like my son. My favourite was always Lazarus, and I still use it sometimes. It all depends on what I’m doing and where I am.” He smiled. “There was a time when I was even known as Archimedes, but I haven’t used the name since I gave it to my son. He is much more of an Archimedes than I am. I only used it because the world was one where I was viewed as a deity of knowledge and wisdom.”
“I can’t see you as an Archimedes.” Uriel stared at Hades. “I can’t see you as a Lazarus either, but I think that’s because I’ve always known you as Hades, and calling you by any other name would be strange.”
Hades smiled. “Sephy feels the same way. She can’t get used to it when I use different names and that’s why we never work together if I’m not known as Hades. It’s too easy for her to forget what she’s meant to be calling me, which can cause problems.” He shook his head. “When it happened before I became known as the two-faced God, so there were sects who worshipped me as Lazurus and sects who worshipped me as Hades. It wouldn’t have been that bad if the sect of Hades hadn’t performed sacrifices, because of my position as one of the three deities of Death.”
“You make being an angel seem easy.”
“In some ways it is, Uriel, but that’s because you lead very different lives to us. Angels could easily chose to follow the same path we have, although I can’t see it happening.”
“Having someone worship me feels wrong. I’m not ready for something like that.”
“When I was still in training I didn’t feel ready to have someone worship me. I was even thinking of going so far as to asking for some more time before I was given a race to guide. Then I talked to Hecate and she convinced me that until I tried guiding a race I wouldn’t have any idea what it felt like. She was right. Once I started connecting with people all of my worries faded away and I realised Hecate was right. I was meant to be a deity, I was meant to help people, and I was so grateful that I’d taken her advice.”
“Hecate is one of the oldest deities?”
Nodding, Hades ran a hand through his hair. “Hecate is one of the few deities who was once mortal. She’s never told me what happened and I’ve never felt comfortable asking, so that’s all I know.”
“Why not?” a female voice asked from behind them, sounding amused.
“It might be a story you don’t want to tell,” Hades replied, as they both turned to look at the new arrival.
Uriel looked at the woman who had appeared behind them. She wasn’t at all what he’d been expecting. The deity appeared to be much younger than the crone Goddess he’d read so much about and much more beautiful. When their eyes met it was easy for him to see the millennia she’d lived through in her eyes, but that didn’t make her any less beautiful to him. Smiling, she took a couple of steps towards them, and then he could feel the power she held within her. When he’d first met Hades Uriel had felt his power too and as they got to know each other it slowly got easier to ignore what he could feel. He could imagine it taking much longer with Hecate.
“There was a time I wasn’t comfortable talking about my mortal life, but things have changed now, Hades. I’ve been alive a very long time and, even though it often doesn’t seem that way, things do get easier with time.” Hecate looked at Uriel and he felt as though she was seeing into him. “Uriel, I know right now things are difficult. You don’t know who you are, what you are, or why you’re here, but some day you will. I promise.”
“Can you see the future?” Uriel asked, feeling a little uncomfortable.
“Persephone allows me to borrow her vision pool whenever I want to and I took an afternoon to look into your future, Uriel, because you’re a part of Hades’ life. Anything that happens to you may affect Hades and…” Hecate shrugged. “I guess I’ve always been overprotective. I think of Persephone and Hades as family, so I look after them as best I can, even though I know they need to make their own mistakes sometimes. To begin with I thought that Hades getting close to you was a mistake, because I didn’t know much about the angels of the afterlife until Hades told me about you, and that meant I needed to learn more about you.”
“Your theory?”
“Normally it’s possible to see into the past and the future of any mortal or immortal. With you it’s almost impossible to see into your past, even though you’ve been alive for a couple of millennia now, which makes me think you might be tulpas. The theory was one I came up with before I really knew much about you, but now I’m more certain of it.” Hecate smiled. “It puts you in an interesting position, Uriel. You can choose what you want to do with your life. I’ve guided a couple of tulpas before, so if you do need any help feel free to ask.”
“The other angels?”
“They have the same choice as you. I know you’re going to want to talk to the other angels about my theory and what I’ve learnt, but don’t do it right away. You need time to understand what this all means to you first, before you start trying to help the rest of the angels, although I have a feeling you aren’t going to change that much, Uriel. Unlike many of the angels you’ve made real connections with different types of people, from spirit guides to deities, and that’s a good thing.”
Mirrored from K. A. Webb Writing.
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Date: 2014-01-07 03:46 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-01-08 03:58 pm (UTC)https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tulpa
I am finding myself really enjoying this arc, despite being an atheist/scientist.
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Date: 2014-01-08 04:24 pm (UTC)I'm glad you're enjoying it.