September Surprise Story Week: Skyler continued: Inquisition Collection: 643 words

[k_a_webb]

See the beginning of this story here (LJ link).
See the second part of this story here (LJ link).
See the third part of this story here (LJ link).

 

“I hope it never happens to me too,” Louisa said, glancing down at the newspaper. “When I think of that poor girl, and what's going to happen to her whether she's found guilty or not guilty, I feel even more grateful that I'm here, that I got lucky.” She looked at Skyler. “Death for a guilty verdict or living a half life if she's found not guilty. She'll never be able to study law again.”

Skyler sighed. “I'm not ungrateful, but I do wish I had lived more of life before I ended up here.” He bit his lip, thinking. “I know that it's possible that I would have felt this way about the safe houses even if I did get to do my GCSEs, so maybe I just...” He looked around the safe house. “Life is meant to be more than this. This is surviving.”

“Surviving is better than nothing, Skyler, but I can't see this as just surviving. We are still able to live a full enough life down here, even if it is different to the life we would have lived.” Louisa sighed. “I will do everything I can to make my life fulfilling and interesting because if I don't then I'm letting down my parents and the people who rescued me.” She shrugged. “My parents are dead because of the Inquisition and I thought I would spend my childhood in one of those boarding schools where I would have to pretend that I was just like everyone else. Instead I was rescued from that fate and I now have the chance to be who I am rather than live a half life as Louisa, the girl whose parents were arrested and executed for being witches. Not being that girl is worth spending the rest of my life living in safe houses.”

“I guess it is different for you.” Skyler found himself smiling, just for a second, but it was a smile. “If I hadn't been found I probably would be dead.” He stared down at the paper rather than looking at Louisa because he didn't want to see the sympathy he knew would be in her eyes and written all over her face. “Death is incomparable to the life I'm living now and, maybe, if I did have an image of another me living a different life, a worse life, then I would see this as a better alternative.” He sighed. “I know life logically is better than death, but sometimes I wonder. I feel guilty for wondering, because I know there are so many people out there who don't get this chance, and now one of them may be my best friend from before which makes me feel even worse about it.”

“Don't feel guilty, Skyler. You're allowed to feel that way. I would never say that you shouldn't feel angry, or disappointed, or ungrateful, because everyone is going to feel differently about living in a safe house. There's no possible way I can understand what it feels like for you and... I get where you're coming from, even though I can't understand. Sometimes, no matter grateful I am to be here, I can't help wondering if it would have been easier to just accept what was happening to me. I wouldn't have been me, but at least I would have been able to do all the things I dreamed of doing like going to university. I have days like that, because I think we all have days when we think of what we could have been doing at this point in our lives, and I think that makes it harder for you because you know you should be more grateful than the rest of us because you would have been dead, but you've lived so long in a safe house that it's become difficult to be grateful.”

© K A Jones 2011


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