>> because no one from the Council to get to the sibling worlds. <<
I think that should say "can get" or "knows how to get" above.
>> she had Quetzel powers <<
That should say "Quetzal" throughout.
>>Being a natural or true Moonjumper is dangerour, <<
That should say "dangerous" above.
The Larnachi’s want the problem solved<<
Delete apostrophe.
>>I represent both races that still dislike due to the war<<
"that still dislike them" or "that they still dislike" ...?
>>I have Fasaci and Motharan<<
That should say "Fasachi" above.
>> “One of the pup birds from Sheepshank has given me an idea of who to talk to and she should be sending a message ahead of me, so that should help.” <<
This needs a speaker tag.
On the whole, I enjoyed the exploration of Moonjumpers and the return to the counterfeit issue.
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2013-04-23 01:34 am (UTC)I think that should say "can get" or "knows how to get" above.
>> she had Quetzel powers <<
That should say "Quetzal" throughout.
>>Being a natural or true Moonjumper is dangerour, <<
That should say "dangerous" above.
The Larnachi’s want the problem solved<<
Delete apostrophe.
>>I represent both races that still dislike due to the war<<
"that still dislike them" or "that they still dislike" ...?
>>I have Fasaci and Motharan<<
That should say "Fasachi" above.
>> “One of the pup birds from Sheepshank has given me an idea of who to talk to and she should be sending a message ahead of me, so that should help.” <<
This needs a speaker tag.
On the whole, I enjoyed the exploration of Moonjumpers and the return to the counterfeit issue.