The World Walkers: Quiar: The Case of the Counterfeit Enchantments (part 9, 84th continuation)
“It’s become special to all of us,” Peric said, looking around the dining room he had spent so much of his time in, alone and with the others. The conversations he had most enjoyed had been the ones he’d had with Meriwether, learning more about the Web from the perspective of someone who had lived there since its creation. “Even though I don’t much like Seahorse Port this bed and breakfast has been a sanctuary for me, a place I feel comfortable because I know Meriwether will always warn me if someone is likely to arrive here. He gives me time to prepare myself for the change and I really appreciate that.”
“Knowing Merry he probably had the same sort of problem in a past life, so understands better than the rest of us what it’s like to be in your position.” Lucille smiled. “I’m glad I got to meet him.”
“So am I.” Peric was grateful for the change of subject, so it was something he was going to cling to, because he needed to take his mind off the pain that was beginning to be too much for him – and he knew it wasn’t his own. “He’s been talking to me about the ritual and I’ve been wondering what it would be like for me to learn about my past lives, especially as he said that others who had difficulties with strong magic have often lived more than one life. I’m scared, because it’s not simple, but I really think I want to do it.”
Lucille nodded. “It’s something I think I’m going to do as well, in part because I want to be able to pass the ritual on. With the way the Web is changing it’s something I believe should be open to anyone who wants to do it, as long as they’ve actually thought about what it means to learn about who they were before, and after talking to Kester I’ve realised that not that many people will want to. Those of us who are in the position to understand what it means to have the memories of our old lives have said we want to do it and those of us who aren’t have said no. Like Bertram.”
“Things might change for him while we’re here.” Peric glanced up, hoping the sedative had worked. “I don’t think they will, now, but even having a true Moonjumper here doesn’t mean we know what’s happening.” He looked back at Lucille, hoping she hadn’t taken offence at what he’d said and was grateful to see the understanding in her eyes. “Even though I understand why the worlds have made the choice that they have it doesn’t make this any easier.”
‘Sorry, Peric, if I could have warned you I would, but this is something that might have had to happen.’ Quiar sighed and Peric tried to hide his shock at being talked to once more by a world he hadn’t known was sentient until he met Lucille. ‘Knowing the future and knowing what is meant to happen are two very different things, unfortunately. Even the deities have the same problem. We simply don’t know enough sometimes about how things connect, although we’ve tried to learn as much as we can about the situation in order to make the decision. The times when we find that something horrible is meant to happen…’
“What would you have done if you had of known that what happened to Bertram wasn’t meant to be?” Lucille asked, and Peric realised that Quiar was talking to both of them at the same time.
‘I would have told you. Bertram didn’t deserve this and I hope that you find someone who can heal his wing, but I have a horrible feeling it is something that was meant to happen.’
Peric swallowed. “Am I meant to do something to the surviving assassin?” he asked, even though he was terrified of what the answer might be.
‘There’s nothing like asking difficult questions, is there, little mouse?’ Quiar sounded amused, although it faded quickly. ‘Lucille knows that I can’t answer that, because anything I say might give you the impression that I know one way or another, and I don’t. Personally I’d quite like to be able to hurt her myself after what the two of them did, but I can’t, so I have to live with that, as well as the choice I had to make in letting Bertram get hurt in the first place. The question you need to ask yourself is whether you’d be able to live with yourself if you hurt the remaining assassin.’
Nodding, Peric thought of the moment that Bertram and Lucille had walked into the bed and breakfast. It was obvious that they’d fought for their lives. The fight had tired both of them out, but that hadn’t stopped Lucille from doing what needed to be done, the way she always did, so it wasn’t long before the healer arrived. When that happened he’d tried to check on Lucille, knowing how important the Moonjumper was to all of them, and she’d told him to focus on Bertram before disappearing upstairs. She seemed to have some idea already of how badly Bertram had been hurt, even though she knew very little about wings.
It wasn’t long after that Sini had arrived, having already heard about the fight from someone, and she was up there with Bertram. Peric thought she was the best person to be up there when he woke, because she would understand how he was feeling. Even though Peric tried he couldn’t understand what it was like to be a raven who might have lost the use of one of his wings for the rest of his life. Thinking of that made him angry again. Bertram might never be able to glide again because of the assassins, and the counterfeit ring. They might both have died if they hadn’t been prepared for a fight, if Lucille hadn’t thought ahead and made sure they both had charms just in case something happened, and Peric suddenly realised how close he’d come to losing two important people in his life.
He could still feel the pain the surviving assassin was feeling. If he wanted to he could find her, but he wasn’t sure he would be able to live with himself if he did something to her. Sitting there, in the bed and breakfast with Lucille close by, it was easy enough to let the anger he felt at what had happened to the two of them overtake his mind, and stop him from thinking of what would happened afterwards. Knowing that she was out there, that she probably knew more about the counterfeit ring that anyone else they’d come across, made it tempting to take the information he needed from her, to bring an end to the interminable stay in Seahorse Port, but what if that made things worse.
What if doing that meant they had to travel somewhere else, somewhere more dangerous? Peric didn’t want his friends to be in any more danger than they already were. At least then it would mean something was happening, instead of simply sitting in the bed and breakfast day after day, wondering what might have happened to the guards this time. There was no simple answer, no easy decision he could make, even though he knew all his worries would fade away if he stopped thinking. Letting his anger make the final decision would be the simplest and most dangerous option.
‘Sometimes, Peric, we have to let our emotions make the decisions for us, instead of thinking things through so much. My siblings have argued with me about that several times before and, although I don’t necessarily agree, for you it’s something I think makes more sense. You live a much shorter life, you aren’t always thinking about the big picture the way I am, and sometimes you need to stop thinking. Push all of your worries aside and do what feels right.’
‘Letting my emotions take control doesn’t feel right,’ Peric thought, hoping Quiar could hear him, ‘yet it feels like it what I should be doing, because I’m thinking too much about my feelings for them to be just the way I feel.’ Did she understand what he meant when he said that? That he knew by thinking about what he was feeling he was letting his thoughts affect his feelings. ‘I know that going after the assassin is going to change things, for me, for the others, for the investigation, and that scares me, Quiar, because, as much as I hate being stuck in this position, at least being stuck is predictable. Once I make this decision I lose control once more.’
‘You aren’t in control now. The counterfeiters are. If they weren’t you would have left Seahorse Port a long time ago, because you wouldn’t have felt the need to be here. Unfortunately, or maybe fortunately, you’re one of those people who can’t leave a job unfinished, and the way the counterfeiters seemed to have taken over the market just be making things hard for the charm makes made you realise that it isn’t just about Sheepshank.’
Mirrored from K. A. Webb Writing.
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Wowch. Nailed it.
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