ext_3219 (
ysabetwordsmith.livejournal.com
) wrote
in
k_a_webb
2011-12-30 11:53 pm (UTC)
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>>in order to fulfil his duty <<
That should say "fulfill" above.
>> There would be people watching, in the same way there always was<<
Subject/verb disagreement: change "was" to "were" above.
>>it was obvious the words weren't met<<
I think that should say "meant" above.
>>He is the son of the Dorma supremacist movement and I just don't like or trust him.”<<
That should probably say "Dorma supremacist leader" or somesuch.
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Feedback
That should say "fulfill" above.
>> There would be people watching, in the same way there always was<<
Subject/verb disagreement: change "was" to "were" above.
>>it was obvious the words weren't met<<
I think that should say "meant" above.
>>He is the son of the Dorma supremacist movement and I just don't like or trust him.”<<
That should probably say "Dorma supremacist leader" or somesuch.