>>On the day he choose to fulfil his destiny and become a Watcher was the same day he left everything behind.MM
This should say either: "On the day he choose to fulfil his destiny and become a Watcher, he left everything behind." OR "The day he choose to fulfil his destiny and become a Watcher was the same day he left everything behind."
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This should say either:
"On the day he choose to fulfil his destiny and become a Watcher, he left everything behind."
OR
"The day he choose to fulfil his destiny and become a Watcher was the same day he left everything behind."
>>She'd got angry then,<<
That should probably say "She'd gotten" instead.